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Given how I've reacted in the past to things not going my way, you probably think I have battled with discouragement and frustration, disappointment even. Honestly though I haven't. There are two reason for that. The less spiritual reason (although, I'm not convinced God didn't time this) is because I am not feeling well and just haven't really processed the whole impact of what this means. That notwithstanding, I'm not battling disappointment or frustration more due to the fact that God did show me a few days ago through the story of Jarius that He can and still will work when, humanly speaking, time has run out.
What keeps going through my head even now as I am writing this, is the fact that Jesus allowed Himself to be delayed, first by the massive crowds and second by a woman who was in desperate need of healing. Those delays must have been agonizing for Jarius...something I can relate to. Jesus knew what needed to happen in order to build Jarius' faith and glorify His Father and simply healing a ill daughter wasn't going to accomplish it. The delays had to happen for God's timing to be perfect. God could have answered my request at any time. I am thankful in many respects He hasn't. One reason I am particularly grateful in this moment for concerns a request I have made often. My flesh often fights hard for recognition and credit in this prayer. My sin nature, while okay with God getting credit, still wants to be noticed. I pray with diligence that everything that will bring God credit and glory will be accomplished in this request and that nothing that I can take credit for will be granted. My flesh grumbles a lot about that and some days it is much harder than others to allow the Spirit to crucify it. From day one, I have realized that God has to move in a mighty way to fulfill this request. As time has gone by, I have realized more and more the need for the hand of God to work to bring about a fulfillment. With the NFL off-season starting, Tebow's time will be dictated almost entirely by the Jets, leaving him little if any time for a visit to Hawaii. A week ago, I would have despaired and fretted and begged and pleaded with God. I would have questioned why He waited until it was too late to answer. A week ago, however, I hadn't re-read about Jarius and learned all that God showed me. The delays were necessary. They have put this prayer into a place that will bring God tremendous glory, because as of now, He is the ONLY one who can work out Tebow's schedule and bring him to Hawaii.
Jesus told Jarius He would heal His daughter and despite timing 'issues', He did. God has promised my kids will meet Tebow before their school year ends and despite our timing 'issues' He will.
"Fear not, only believe"
I understand the "crucifying the flesh" part. As much as we want God to get all the glory, there is still a little part of us that wants to say, "Look what I helped do". Even though we understand it is God doing the thing, our human nature always wants to take His glory somehow. The older I get, the more I've discovered what a prideful being I am and I sure wish I could get rid of that stuff. At the same time, God tells us to pray with faith, and so that does take action on our part. It's in the doing that our pride rises. But did we help? God doesn't need our help. Instead we obeyed. We can be proud that we obeyed God, can't we, and not be concerned that we had anything to do with God answering? That is how I view it. Thank you God, that I obeyed You, and You performed this glorious thing.
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